Rise Of The Geek
Geeks: up until last night I was fairly confident that the Geek would remain unevolved for the next million years. (By ‘unevolved’ I mean that the Geek reached its maximum state of evolution around a hundred years ago, and that this type of human hasn’t changed since, because it hasn’t needed to). But what happened last night changed my mind. What I saw in the pub was that the Geek race has taken a massive step forward (or backward, depending on how orthodox your views on Geekism are). What I saw, no less, was a MUSCLE-BOUND GEEK. He was sitting with a squadron of geeks, seemingly accepted as one of them–
When I think Geek I think hair loss, advanced Alegbra, a face that could bore a battleship in to sinking, and an ability to hypothesize things which mere mortals would never even dream of. But this Geek was different! He clearly worked out, had a thick head of hair and was adorned in clothes which (most worryingly) enabled him to fit in with the rest of the lower I.Q. society. In fact, it is no exaggeration to say that had he been Geekless friendless I probably wouldn’t have ever suspected he had his roots in Geekism. It was an astonishing and frightening development: it was the day I realized that Geeks were coming one step closer to ruling the world and there is nothing I can do about it.
I wouldn’t normally mind the thought of Geeks running the world, but here’s the thing: it just seems unfair a Geek can be super intelligent and also better looking than me! But I guess I will have to learn to live with it. I saw another today, and this time it was a beautiful girl!
